Its not all about the baby...

Good morning Lovelies..

As i write today, i am sitting here giving myself my own advice... so i am using YOU to get it down on paper (or rather computer) so when tough days come i can bring it up.. read it.. and take a good dose of my own medicine.. Thank you for being the reason i write today.

Life is so busy sometimes huh.. but if i think back to all Ive done in the last few weeks i can vaguely remember loads of washing, housework, playing with my girl, cooking a few meals.. and did i remember to vacuum??

The weeks go by sometimes and blur into one big mess of repetitive motions... and before you know it .. you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and shriek in despair when the woman staring back at you resembles a chubby naked version of your own self that is now a distant memory.. For what seems like a past life ago you begin to remember the days where you would get up, get pretty and take yourself off shopping to buy a well deserved sundress just because.. well it was sunny! You didn't really need an excuse to buy yourself something, nor did you need to justify yourself as to why you slept in til 11... those 3 cocktails you spend 50 bucks on didn't matter.. and sex.. well it was just a normal part of your daily routine!

As i stood there.. naked.. makeupless and my hair resembling a birds nest.. i looked in the mirror and thought.. who am i.. or rather who WAS i !?

As i started getting dressed.. i went to the wardrobe.. and all i could see were my semi folded tracksuits, tatty tights, over sized tee shirts and nursing bras... I remember the days my wardrobe used to be filled with pretty, small, fresh and new outfits ready to show off my cute body in over the weekend..
Now.. its frump ville! I began to get cross, thinking "geez when is the last time i brought myself something pretty-- just because..." I then was struck with the revelation that even if i had a Divine wardrobe... where the HELL am i going to wear it? The bread shop across the road? on my morning walk?
Oh how life has changed...... i sulked for about ten mins... and then caught sight of my daughter sleeping soundly in her cot making little sleep noises that sounds like a teeny kitten purring... As much as there is parts i miss about the old me... about the life i had before all this... i wouldn't change it for anything... i am exactly where i have always wanted to be.... married to an incredible man and a mother of a beautiful daughter..

But, there are still some things that over the last 4 months of parent hood i have learnt help (and yes, I'm still very new in the game and am constantly learning!)... But from my experience, i have found, these things make life a little easier and help make you feel a bit more.. well.. human.. Here they are:

Wear something that matches-- Yep, its that simple. There are days i look like i have fallen into the wardrobe and come out wearing the pile i landed in... I'm talking, my husbands tracksuit bottoms, a weird discolored singlet i ruined in a load of washing and a weird mo hair cardigan i once picked up at a sale... Its amazing how much you will feel better if your wearing something that at least matches.. (and from my experience, black works a treat!)

Put a bit of makeup on and brush your hair even when staying at home-- Now this is a task in itself when your neck deep in loads of washing and ironing and keeping baby entertained.. but make it an aim that when you get up in the morning, whack on a bit of foundation and a slick of lip gloss and you will feel better for it. trust me!

Play music! And YOUR music—itl make you feel more like an adult: I have found that having something playing in the background of your daily doings instantly lifts my mood... My daughter is now a fan of Adel, Beyonce and Coldplay.. Children will adapt!! Yes, there is a time for Justine Clarke and the Wiggles greatest hits.. but have YOUR stuff playing around the house sometimes.. and it will make you feel lighter! (as long as its not Marilin Manson or KORN-- i suggest you keep that for your own ears only ha! )

Magazines in nursery to read while if baby is occupying herself-- Hubby brought home some mags for me last night.. and i looked at him and said "um.. I'm not sure when ill have the time to read these.. but ah.. thanks!"... and then i had the brilliant idea of popping them in the playroom .. While miss muffet lay on the floor discovering her feet.. i managed to sit next to her and read a whole article about spring fashion AND play with her at the same time--- this is one of my cleverest moments so far!

Have a glass of wine every now and then-- really. do it. over dinner, on the weekend. whenever. But it will relax you and make you feel like a grown up even sitting amongst the toys and highchair and baby crap! 

Dedicate ten mins a night to talk to your hubby about something that isn’t baby related-- and don't let that little monkey creep into your conversation either! You will not believe how i have had to train myself to not involve her in ten mins of conversation! Yes youre parents and have a gorgeous little child.. but that's not the be all and end all of conversations-- YES there is other things to talk about.. so make an effort to have ten mins of baby free convo a night... you ll be surprised at what you end up talking about and it might even encourage a laugh or two! :)

Play a board game! It'll do wonders for your marriage-- Only on the weekend, hubby and i sat down to a game of balderdash with the in laws and it was SO refreshing to just play and laugh and think of silly things that had nothing to do with anything! It cleared our minds and we felt fabulous after it! Go buy a silly game this week and make time for a game here and there.. its fun to be the kids for a change!!

Buy something for you or the house—again something not baby related-- Good old retail therapy.. never fails..

Ask for 1 hour to yourself on the weekend—its not asking for much but will re charge your batteries-- A bath, sitting outside in the sunshine.. a chance to cut your nails (you know they are wayyyy overgrown now).. a chance to just breath, re group and gather your thoughts.. or not.. you might choose to do absolutely nothing-- and that's great too!

Eat dinner together (aim to have your baby in bed before dinner is served)-- an almost impossible thing in those first few weeks of parenthood.. but a few months in, you should be able to sort out bubs feeding and time it with dinner.. even if its just a few night a week.. Sitting with hubby for a meal and a glass of red is really important .. adult time is always refreshing.

Set goals—eg a little weekend away—it will give your something to look forward to-- Have something to brake the same old same old. Plan a weekend away.. (and you can take bub or not) but it will give you something to look forward to.. a change of scene is great for re charging those batteries giving you a fresh perspective! 

Have sex at least once a week—do it even if your tired, once you start, you ll be glad you did lol... make the effort to make love.. Yes your both tired, perhaps cranky from a long day, but there is nothing like the throws of passion to wake you up and leave you feeling rejuvenated! .. Anddd it burns calories.. BONUS :)

Call a friend just to chat! (especially great for those who live away from friends and family)-- I did this just last week, chatted with a friend on skype for 40 mins... when i got offline i felt lighter and happy.. There is nothing quite like a good chat with a girlfriend

Get a diary and write out a to do list—even if its just sorting which days to do what housework, it will make you feel more organised, in control of your week and once you cross those jobs off you will feel like you re achieving something

Date nights- so important. Aim to do it once a month.

Have a bitch— youre human, you re allowed to have bad days. And even mummy's need to have a bitch... find that special someone who will listen, make you laugh and understand... a vent is so therapeutic

Leave the housework til tomorrow-- If you re having 'one of those days' and you re just not feeling particularly motivated.. are tired, rundown and non enthused.. leave the housework for today-- it will be there tomorrow. There is nothing worse then tackling the washing basket when you have a chip on your shoulder.. you will probably end up in a heap on the floor in tears after you've tried to fold the same pair of pants 5 times and it just isn't working -- trust me, I've been there. If your having a rough one, leave the chores until you have a better frame of mind. The world isn't going to end if you take one day off housework

Never go to bed without saying sorry-- All those little comments, those snarly remarks.. the snaps you make at each other because you are tired, over it and exhausted.. they don't really mean anything... don't go to bed without saying, "sorry, i love you babe".. if you hurt each other with words, make sure you apologise... you don't need the additional stress and upset of an unhappy partner.. its not worth staying mad.

Eat chocolate. Seriously. It helps.

And most importantly. NEVER let anyone make you think as though you are not significant just because you are a housewife, a mother or a father. You re job and role in the family is so important. You are the mortar that holds the bricks together. You are the person who your kids look to for comfort, re assurance and stability. The day to day tasks you do might seem little and repetitive.. but it is these repetitive motions that hold your little family together.. you are the glue that helps stick all the pieces of this life you have both created together... don’t doubt your worth... because without YOU... it all comes tumbling down.

Until next time
x

ill catch you when you fall..

Hello lovely readers,

As I sit here with my cup of 6pm coffee—sipping it slowly hoping it will keep me awake after a long day... i have a few things on my mind i thought worth sharing...

Today, I had to do the thing all mothers (and fathers) dread doing... I had to take my baby girl to the doctors to get her vaccinations. I chatted away to the doctor thinking up all possible questions for him to answer hoping it would string out the time a little longer for me to avoid the inevitable... After asking him to weigh her, check her hips, her temperature, her eyes, her length and her fontanel... i ran out of things for him to check... So I then asked about me (ha!)... Yet... the time came quicker than i hoped, and before i knew it he had pulled out two big needles ready to jab my precious one with. I secretly hated him and glared at him with resentment as he proceeded to get her ready to give her the shots. . . She was at the time laughing at me impersonating a duck (funny what we will do to get them to smile!)... And as he poked her with the needle... her dear little face turned from smiling to pouting and then the great almighty scream filled the surgery!

I had to hold myself back from the tears and kept calmly talking to her in soothing tones of reassurance that everything was going to be ok... For what seemed like forever, she was beside herself crying! In reality it was probably 3 minutes before she was smiling again—red faced and all.

My brave little girl.

As the afternoon slowly slipped into twilight I found myself gazing upon my sleeping beauty in my arms... and the thoughts began to play out in my mind...

Who will she grow up to be... where will this life take her... what paths will she walk.. What will be her destiny...?

As I was daydreaming away, I began to think of my own mother... and got a picture of her holding me... once small, helpless and new... did my mother have this moment... am i who she dreamed i would become..

 Thinking about my own personal journey specifically from the age of 18... I started to feel deeply sorry for my mother (and father)... and thought to myself... how could i have done that to them!

What I am referring to is, when I was 18... I ran away from home. Yes I did have my reasons... at the time, i was big and brave and ready to spread my wings... but now i look back on it, they must have been terrified. Long story short, I lived away from my parents for a year... then came back... and ran away again...

But it’s this second time; I believe that put me on the path to where I have ended up today... I met my husband along the way... a journey of self discovery, independence, a longing to be free from the cotton wool that i had been wrapped in for years by my mum and dad...

I see now, that all they wanted to do was protect me from the big bad world out there- and no parent deserves to lose sleep at night wondering where their child is, and if they are safe..

I was selfish, a know it all, a show off, vein, a little lost... an adventurer, a dreamer, a creative soul, kind, immature, loving, hopeful and a romantic at heart..  Searching for my place in the world...

Then I met my husband

My journey with my husband has been long, it has been challenging, exciting, overwhelming at times, romantic and beautiful...  And I have gained strength along that way in my character and who I am...

All the shit (excuse the French) we endure along our paths set us up to be stronger in the toughest of times ahead huh!

I think of all the things we have been through, the ups and downs the happiest of times and the deepest darkest moments in my life... and I look at my daughter and know that this life will bring her much the same.... Highs and lows, times of utter joy and other times of complete despair...

We have all big dreams for our children, and the hope that they will grow into incredible people. Yet we want to protect them and shelter them from life’s battles and storms...

As much as this is true, and as much as i will protect with my life.. I want my girl to LIVE... i want her to experience the amazing things this world has to offer...the good and (gulp)the bad too... Because I know, without the crap parts in life, we do not learn... without the bad parts, we do not grow as people... without the heartbreaks, the losses, the trials and tests that life throws our way we would not be the parents we are today..

A mother’s hope is that when their children get knocked down... they will get back up and be stronger next time.

I know that is what I have learnt... and hearing my mother’s words in a card she sent last week proves to me that although I may have not been the “perfect” daughter through the years... I know this one thing... she is proud of me... and of whom i am... And I can only hope and pray I can one day say the same about my daughter in years to come...

As parents it is our job now, to give our children the tools we have used through our years... to help them get through theirs... our job is to guide, not force.. Our job is to love them when they are being unlovable... to give them reassurance even if we aren’t sure they are making the right choices.. It’s our job to be there when they come back time and time again after making mistakes... it’s our job listen even when it is things we do not want to hear...to catch them when they fall..

Our children will be part of who WE are... there is no denying that. But I want my girl to be who SHE wants to be. No conditions. I will love her for whatever path she chooses.

And this is the incredible gift you get when you become a parent

- Unconditional love.

Until next time..
x

switch off!

Since becoming a mother, it seems as though Ive taken multitasking to a whole new level. And being a woman, it comes naturally.. but when does it become too much? Is there a limit to how many tasks should be all done at the one time? I discovered that yes, there is a limit. A short note to self before I begin- do not try and multi task while in the bath- you will lose. I sadly discovered this the other night while texting, reading and trying to open a chocolate bar while soaking in a bubble bath- I was so determined to complete all tasks at the same time that---- plop. chocolate fell in the bath..i was devastated to say the least- yes I tried to rescue it. no, it didn't taste good.

And so .. here is a little lesson i learnt for the week...

Yesterday afternoon I was in the middle of settling miss muffet, eating a muesli bar (which is often considered my "lunch" these days), sketching whilst busily typing away, updating my Facebook, checking my etse store, writing an email and replying to a text suddenly.. the power went off!!! And I shrieked with horror and objection as if someone had just flashed me in public !! As I frantically tried to fiddle with power points, unplugging this and plugging that.. I turned to realize that.. The television was on... As was the digital clock.. - now to get a picture of our house, we have a long narrow(ish) living room-- of which down one side there are were two lamps, speakers, baby monitor and the PowerPoint my laptop was plugged in to!! On the other side was the TV, clock and other (useless to me) things.. I sat there , puzzled and trying to figure out what the heck was going wrong... I went to update my Facebook status to tell the whole world of this dilemma ( don't u find moments like these are best shared on Facebook lol) when DAMN that's right the laptop is off!!!

I sighed .. and i sat... and sighed some more.. And suddenly i realized-- yup, the universe is trying to tell me something... Slowwwww dowwwwwn!!! And right as I was about to grab my phone to jump online.. Instead, I caught sight of the book that I had once brought in great hope that it would bring me solitude and relaxation (eat.pray.love) .. and now there it was in the bottom of the shelf untouched, unread and forgotten. Yes, the once white and brightly colored cover was now covered in a thick layer of dust. And as I blew the dust off it, I felt as if "reading" had become an ancient past time for me.. Something I had not done in so long..
I opened the book and began reading.. at first struggling to focus and switch off.. but a few sentences in and i was hooked. The next hour i was consumed in the pages and the most relaxed I've been in ages.. (clearly Missy was asleep at this point!) .. I had not only survived a whole hour without my laptop, I had turned the TV off and my phone was not glued to my hand as per usual.. And , boy was the silence bliss-- no checking or updating or sending or "liking" ,.. Just me and a long overdue date with my book.
After that hour of bliss, I felt refreshed... 
As for the power..for fear of being eaten by the giant huntsman spider who has rather rudely made a home in our power box, i decided to wait until dear husband got home to fix it... And for the entire afternoon. I stopped. Even when baby woke, we played and i was able to fully focus on just playing and being a mummy... Now , that's not to say I'm not turning the laptop on ever again-- what would everyone on Facebook think if I was gone!! (lol) but I'm going to make a little pact with myself that every now and then, even just once or twice a week.. I've going to have a date with peace and quiet.. Sit and have nothing to do with technology for an hour or so.. it did me the world of good.. I challenge you this week , to stop texting, chatting, emailing , updating and yes (shock horror) facebooking!! And just enjoy doing something simple!! It might just be having a quiet cup tea (or glass of wine!) .. Playing with your child and hearing their laugh without any busy background noise.. Or maybe .. Reading a
Book. Not an e book-- an actual real one with pages!! And no,
bed doesn't count as your time away from technology .. Don't cheat yourself.
Just stop for even half an hour a week to start with and you will feel a little lighter. I promise.

Until next time .. Bridget x

oh woe is me!

Hello ladies.. well..after much thought over my first (very early) morning coffee ... i have decided to talk about something that at first when i thought it, i pushed it aside thinking, that's silly.. but then came back to it.. realising- yes, this is important. And i bet I'm going to have some men thanking me for this :) The topic today is: Your husband ( or partner, bf, fiance etc).

When you think of your "other half".. what do you initially think of? that spunky, handsome, darling, amazing, wonderful man who is the love of your life"..?.. or is it more like "that cute yet somewhat annoying person who threw his dirty socks on the floor right next to the laundry basket AGAIN".. or is it a mix of the two? Be honest. Do you tend to nag and get peeved when all things aren't peachy, perfect and "just so"!?

As women we are forever trying to obtain perfection, weather it be having a beautiful tidy house, or all the washing done, or that magic tasting dinner.. even to what we look like! We primp, and place and fluff up cushions, we wash and fold things into perfectly clean "sunshine fresh" smelling piles.. we spritz and scent things, we dim lights for ambiance.. arrange things in pretty sequences .. organise ornaments, and vacuum til our little hearts are content and satisfied that there is not one speck of dust anywhere to be seen. And as women, i think this is just in our nature! We want things to look, feel and smell pretty :)
 But secretly, we (am i the only one?) have the expectation (or hope) that it will remain this way for at least a few days.. (dream on) after all our hard work! So when something falls out of place, or the dishes from him cooking aren't immediately washed up or he doesn't jump to make the bed on a Saturday morning .. you think- "stuff that, im not doing it, i always do it!".......wrong attitude. Ive had to sit myself down and give myself a good talking to. And Ive had to shift my focus off myself and start thinking about the very person i chose to spend my life with.. for better or worse. My husband.

This got me thinking...... (and feeling terribly guilty)

I wonder how often he bites his tongue, in fear of getting his head bitten off. I wonder how often he just steps outside .. just to take a quick breather from his full on day. I wonder if he ever comes close to tears just as i do, but stops himself so he doesn't upset me. Maybe those dark circles under his eyes aren't from dehydration (Yes, i nag him about not drinking enough water too!) maybe they are because.. yes.. believe it or not ... he is tired too!
When your spouse comes home and just wants to STOP.. and doesn't really think about where he's putting his stinky shirt.. (on the floor) or if he takes a few minutes to greet you in an excited and happy tone.. what do you do. You get your panties in a twist huh! yup, I do. I think - bloody hell, look at that shirt, doesn't he know ive been tidying all day, i feel so unappreciated right now.. and whats with the silent treatment, he could at least come and give me a kiss- Ive had a hard day cleaning and caring for bub and me me me.. i i i!!!

Ring any bells? Its true isnt it, after a hard day of doing what you do as a wife/mother/girlfriend whatever.. you think "oh woe is me" .. I know I do. I sulk, and "humph" and snap and bicker.. i hiss and bite back with sarcasm all the time. I do it without even thinking. And its time i stopped. Or atleast tried to.
 Here's a thought.
When was the last time you thanked Him for going to work?
Seriously.

I know it might sound silly at first. But think about it. (and this is for you stay at home mums especially).  He goes to work all day, deals with people, talks all day (my husband is in sales), has on a stiff , uncomfortable and boring suit and tie, has to be professional, polite, engaging in conversation, responsive, make decisions, appear alert and awake (even if he has been up til 3am helping you with the baby)... and when he comes home one night out of 5 and isnt happy-go-lucky "super-husband" you get shitty ( excuse the french)
Sometimes.. we as women tend to get so caught up in all the busy,important, exhausting, time consuming things we do that we easily forget that our husbands have a whole other world that they spend their day in.. their job. To us, they get up, trot off to work and then when they walk in the door its "hi hunny.. how was your day -- and then i find myself hardly leaving the poor guy time to answer before I begin rattling off every little detail about my day including how many dirty nappies bub did and what i ate for lunch!.

Its so easy to become consumed in our stuff that you forget about the person you love, adore and are bestfriends with -- our husband.

I began to wonder.. hmm what is he thinking..

Well lastnight, I got a brief a peek. He was being somewhat non responsive when i was going on about my day.. he wasn't ignoring me by an means, he was simply not giving me the proper sentenced responses i was wanting him to give me! (sound familiar).. so what did i do. I snapped - "um. are you even listening to me" i said.. the poor guy just looked at me in confusion and responded "yes? whats the matter"... then he spend the next 1/2 an hour under the wrath of my silence..  i sulked ... "hmmf, he never listens, he thinks what i do during my day is insignificant...bla bla bla" Yup, in my head I was ranting to myself about how unappreciated i felt when BANG - like a tonne of bricks .. he turned around and said.. "sorry smoosh (my nickname- dont laugh!) .. im just tired at the end of the week thats all, i wasnt ignoring you". While i was getting worked up and getting a nasty line ready to bite him with when he next spoke to me, i suddenly woke up and snapped out of it. He was just tired. that's all. plain and simple.

Ladies. Yes, we work hard... and yes we are amazing (if i dont say so myself) .. but , every now and again.. take a look at that person you chose to share your life with, take a look at what he does do instead of focusing on all the things he doesn't do... ask about his day- and pause to hear his response.. hug him often. tell him he is appreciated. let him off the hook sometimes. thank him for his wonderful work ethic and commitment to you.
We are lucky he loves us just the way we are- even though we get shitty, nag, sigh huff and puff, don't have the perfect body (damn it), he loves us when we get upset, emotional, irrational, moody for no reason, when we have no makeup on, mismatched silly odd pyjamas on, our big comfy "i cant be bothered" knickers on, when we screw up, mess up and lose the plot...he still loves us..

.....lets love him back the same way.

I challenge you (like i have had to challenge myself).. to do something nice for him tonight when he comes home from work. Weather it be cook him his favourite dinner.. let him watch a footy game (all the way through!) without complaining.. or maybe just thank him for being such a great husband.

Whatever it is you do, i promise it will lift his spirits and make him feel good.
And that's what its all about really.. making each other feel loved and appreciated..

Until next time
*"the wife who snapped out of it".. Bridget x

From one mama to another: the things they dont tell you about mummyhood!

Well hello there! Ive finally managed to find a spare half an hour to sit and write my next blog! And now a quick "vent".. WOW what a week its been! Firstly very exciting news- i started my own business and created a page for it on facebook http://www.facebook.com/ittybittyindidesigns?ref=hnav and I have been designing, sewing and networking all week! Where the hell did i find the time to do that? I guess when you are passionate about something and love doing it, you somehow manage to find the time to do it!?

Whist in the middle of mummy-duties and designing.. i managed to have a quick shower (well done me!) and while doing all the necessary things one does in the shower, I noticed a rash on my stomach! Not thinking too much about it , i ignored it and got back to washing my hair (again, this is a pat on the back effort for me! lol) .. Later that evening, the rash had spread to all over my stomach and was creepily beginning to crawl down my legs and up my torso! Long story short- the next morning I woke covered head to toe in what looked like bright red "whip" lines and blisters all over me!! After 2 doctors visits, a dose of anti-histamines and some seriously potent tropical potion .. i figured out what i got it from (thanks Google Images!) ... undercooked Shiitake mushrooms!! (ok , so who knew you had to cook them through?!) ON TOP of that I managed to get a nasty infection from the operation I had 5 weeks ago! ... I dont have time for this! Its always the way-- if one thing is going brilliantly in life, 10 things will go wrong all at once!.... (big breath)... ahhh thats better! :)

OK rant and vent over (and thank you for those still reading this..haha)

Today I am going to briefly (until bub wakes at least) chat to you about something that I have learnt since giving birth to my beautiful wee one. And before I begin- a warning to those easily offended, those who get the "icks" hearing about "lady" business, and for all those hopeful, excited, dizzily delirious (as i once was) parents-TO-BE.. stop reading now... (don't wanna burst any bubbles after all :) ..

Ok, so now Ive got your attention, here goes:
I am talking about the things "they" DONT tell you about being a first time mum!

-That even though you have purchased the most expensive "motion detecting" top of the line, state of the art, sensor James bond security type sound monitor--you WILL be that parent who checks if your baby is breathing at least 10 times a night! (even if the cot is right next to your bed!) *blush
- How those lovely (pre pregnancy) skinny leg jeans will never fit quite the same way again-- you will have some sort of bulge or bump that just doesn't smooth out no matter how tight they are-- even if you do somehow lose your baby weight (how do you do that exactly?)- How MASSIVE your boobs will become (for you anyway) -- but not in a "wow, thats a nice sexy set" kind of way.. but more in a "do i dare touch them or will they squirt me in the eye" type way.

-How you will be looked at purely as a milk bar by your baby.. no, thats not loving screams and cries of desperation to be cuddled.. you are their food and your boob is wanted and its wanted NOW!- How sex will change-- yes, it will still be great-- but now you will be subconsciously peeking out of the corner of your eye to make sure your baby isn't getting a free raunchy show-- you will also be alot ..err..quieter too! (ha ha) - you will also be reluctant to talk "dirty" in case baby learns a naughty word lol :D

- How your "lady part" will never quite be the same again, no matter if your surgeon was a master at stitches.. there will always be that little "bit" that's not quite the same.. and don't even get me started on bladder control lol (kegels ladies!)- Your new found respect and admiration for your mum .. and an instant understanding of what she meant when she used to say "you wont understand until you're a mother yourself!" (*rolls eyes)

-You will worry about EVERY little thing-  is she too hot, is she too cold? does she really like having a dummy or is she just having it becuase i put it in her mouth, should i be giving her a dummy? have i burped her for long enough? is she getting enough milk? is she happier swaddled or free? is this nappy on to tight? is she content? it never ends does it!

- If you have a pet , it now becomes a "ill do it tomorrow" task.. once was it a gorgeous little creature you doted over, sang to (we have a bird), cleaned daily, chatted to, played with..... and now its lucky if it gets a hello in the morning (and dont go calling the RSPCA on me -- its now been handed over as one of hubbys duties lol)... poor budgie

- Shame.  You have none.  You quicky lost it through all those gyno appointments in pregnancy! Once every man and his dog has see your "va jay jay" — does it really matter?  nursing pad hanging just a little out of your singlet? oh well atleast its not your nipple. vomit on your shoulder?  That’s what wipes are for!  Singing in a weirdo baby/cookie monster voice in the middle of Coles to get your bub to stop crying?  oh well, if they watched seasme street theyd understand! yup, your dignity goes right out the window as soon as those precious  pink lines appear on the pregnancy test-- from pee, to poo to vomit and nipples-- nothing can embarrass you anymore!

- The toilet becomes your new favourite place! Yes, its quiet, theres a door with a lock and theres only enough room in there for one! That white shiney seat brings you 3 mins of sweet solitute! Just enough time to re group :)

- You speak in the 3rd person! "does baby want her dummy", "mummy had a headache from you screaming in her ear!".. "When is daddy going to get home, mummy needs a rest!"

- Your living room turns from being neat and tidy into something that resembles half a bedroom (what are all these pillows doing on the floor?) and a chemist-- wipes, eye drops, baby panadol, nappy cream-- you name it, youve got it! Once the hardest task was finding the right angle to place that photoframe on the coffee table... now the hardest thing is trying to find the remote under the mounds of crap everywhere! :D

- Once youve "popped" out your precious, you automatically get "give me advice" tatoo'd on your forhead! yes, everyone (especially those who havent even had kids!!) wants to put in their two cents worth about how you should be raising your child! "oh no, you shouldnt be doing that" or..."do you really think thats best?...when I was a kid, my mum..."..... After almost turning into a basket case listening to everyones advice in the first weeks (midwives are the WORST) -Ive now learnt to smile politly, nod your head ... and let all their advice go in one ear... and out the other :) ... no one knows your baby better than YOU do and YOU know whats best for them! (this is one of the biggest things ive learnt so far)



- no matter how rough the previous night has been, no matter how many items of clothing (both yours and baby's) has been covered with vomit, no matter how emotional, exhausted and on the verge of tears you are -- your baby smiles and just like THAT everything disappears and everything is ok again-- their smile lights you up instantly and troubles forgiven and forgotten!

- How this tiny little thing that was placed in your hands after pushing and pushing and working the hardest you've ever worked in your life can become the thing that you would do ANYTHING for! The thing that you would sacrifice anything for, yearn to teach, nurture and protect with your life... this tiny,wrinkled, squealing thing has instantly become the love of your life and the most beautiful thing you ever did see!

So when you begin to doubt yourself, question your worth when your main daily duties are housework and keeping bubba happy...when you feel a little depleted and are exhausted at the end of the day remember this: There will never be another job more important than that of a mother. And to this precious little person, you are their world.

Until next time...
Bridget x

P.s- this blog did not take the intended quick 1/2 hour... it took all day :) stopping and starting between feeds, nappies, cuddles and playtime! its a bit like that huh x

and so the blogging begins...

...with a freshly brewed coffee in hand on this pretty Saturday morning.. i sit here with slight schoolgirl excitement as i begin documenting aka "blogging" about the present chapter in my life-- I am eager for you to hear the voice of a mother, a wife and a creative soul--In hope that I can perhaps reach you on some level so that you may look at your day today a little differently because of what you read here :)

I suppose I should start off by introducing myself.. My name is Bridget.. Ive always been a free-spirited, emotional, sometimes impulsive yet super organised, sensitive, thoughtful, dramatic, somewhat spiritual, a little crazy, smiley, slightly self conscious, relatively outgoing, poetic and romantic, creative to the core -and a wear-your-heart-on-your-sleeve kind of girl. People either love me..or .. well they choose to keep their distance (lol).

It was about 5 years ago (after i had done the whole "I'm a teenager, I'm going to rebel" thing) that i met the love of my life, two years ago (this November) I married him ..and just this April past, I gave birth to the baby I had forever hoped, prayed and wished for-- my little Indi Winter.

I suppose for me, this blog is like a bit of an outlet.. something i can have just for my very own (and now that I'm a mummy, aside from taking a shower-- its about all i have that's not shared :)
After 9 long, amazing, emotional and tiring months we finally became parents to our beautiful tot. Motherhood is just so amazing, its so fulfilling, scary at times, rewarding and the hardest job you'll ever do-- but so worth it to see your child thrive and learn each day- knowing that "hey! I taught you that!".
BUT...
After the first few weeks with Indi, the days began to roll into one. They went a little something like this-
Up, feed, change nappy, settle, (squeeze in a quick shower), feed, change nappy, settle...... and so on (is any other mamas out there feeling me?)
Now, I know that sounds very typical of what the first weeks are supposed to be like in early motherhood-- but it wasn't until one day i realised i had not left the living room almost the entire day that i thought-- OK Bridget, you've got this mother thing pretty well down pat- its time for you to find a hobby!
In fear of becoming a crazy hermit lady who occasionally bathed, lived in her pyjamas, could change a nappy with her eyes closed and spent most of her time sitting on the couch with one breast out .. i started to think of what ELSE i could do when Indi was off in the land of nod.
and so the pondering began......
"what is something little I can do for me each day?".. I began to think back to the things I used to enjoy doing the most.
Singing.. Strumming my guitar.. writing.. art.. craft...craft...CRAFT! that's it! - sounds awfully "better homes and gardens" of me, but back when i used to nanny I used to really enjoy doing craft with with kids and making all sorts of funny little things.. like peg people .. and egg carton castles and pipe cleaner jewelery! But of coarse these things no longer had a purpose --Indi's much too teeny to do these kind of activities yet (however she is exceptionally good at giggling, cooing and sucking her fingers! *says the proud mother)

hmm..So.. trying to incorporate a hobby into everyday mummyhood was appearing to be a bit tricky-- until *ding! a light bulb moment!
I could start making bits and bobs for my miss muffet! Things that she could wear!
So off I trotted to spotlight - basket in one hand and coffee in the other ( my readers will soon learn I am rarely without a latte in hand when there is an important task to be done).
Browsing the isles proved to be slightly overwhelming as i searched for a medium to create with.. cotton and ribbons and buttons- oh my!
But just as i was about to get myself into a frustrated textile tizzy- I stumbled upon the "felt" section- and right there in the isle I began to mentally create my first design!

So this is where I am up to now- In my (rare) spare moments I have been sketching, designing, cutting and hand sewing my tiny (original) felt features onto baby garments.

After much thought and a few rhyming games with my husband in the car today -- I have come up with the name of my label .

I am proud to announce the beginning (and these are my baby steps) of my children's label

*ittybittyindi*

All of the felt embellishments and motifs are original designs and hand sewn with love..

As i come to the end of my very first blog --
i want to end it with a question .. to you. "when is the last time you did something JUST FOR YOU?"..
I challenge you to revisit a little dream, a passion that's lost its once brightly flickering flame, no matter how small or insignificant it is among the "big wide world of being a serious adult"... just do it ...

You never know-- it might just be the thing that saves you from being too "grown up" and boring!
What are the things you miss most about just being you?


Love&Peace

Bridget x